It’s Sunday. I fill my room with plants, light a candle, put some atmospheric lighting on. There’s water by the side, a taperware with fruit in case I’m hungry, my computer, headphones and eyeshades. I’m ready. I’ve been considering this for a couple months and planning it the last couple of weeks. I faced some…
Read More A trip on magic mushrooms: exploring perfectionismI’m at a festival and the place is full of topless men. I enjoy the music a lot and I’m trying to let go and have fun with it. I keep getting distracted by these beautiful bodies. I see all these men around me savouring the attention, it feels as if they put all this…
Read More Why I started working out more often (and what I learned in the process)A warning about the content of this article: even if I don’t describe any events of sexual abuse, I talk about the discussions that took place when the Leaving Neverland Michael Jackson documentary was out. If you think you might find the content triggering, it’s totally okay to come back to it when you are…
Read More Leaving neverland: on questioning sexual trauma survivor experiencesThere’s some sort of story about me that seems to be manifesting pretty creatively in different contexts and quite often. There’s a lot I don’t know about it. For now the only thing that’s sure is that it keeps happening. It’s as if there’s a message I need to get which I don’t seem to…
Read More A pattern of comparison and rejection: why do they always choose him over me?A warning about the content of this post: even if I don’t describe any events in detail, in this piece I mention thoughts around suicide that some people might find triggering. I’m not a morning person. I’ve never really been one. I can’t remember many times that I woke up in the morning and felt…
Read More I’m not a morning personI don’t know how many times I’ve heard friends, relatives and acquaintances say that they think people overdo it with this whole consent thing – but they’re a lot. Every time I hear it part of my heart breaks. That’s partly because I have to explain again and again why I think this view is…
Read More Consent: my thoughts on why we don’t want to do it, what it looks like and why it mattersIt’s 2-3 years ago when I arranged to meet that older guy for erotic massage exchange. The first thing he told me was that it’s hard for him to get erections. I told him not to worry and that I didn’t really care, especially as that’s not what we were about to do. We were…
Read More On getting hard (or not)Yesterday was a great day. I had a hot date with a handsome man who I met on Grindr. He’s from abroad, here on holiday at a place nearby. I was planning to go for a swim anyway, so I arranged to visit him as well. I was looking forward to it. I took the…
Read More The perfect day: lies and online datingIt’s interesting to be spending time in Greece during my adult years. I left my country when I was 22 and didn’t get a chance to get to know many different aspects of it. The truth is that I got disappointed in so many ways growing up here that I actually refused to get to…
Read More Things I learned from chatting with a faceless profile on Grindr
